How to behave with married children

As parents, seeing our children grow up and get married brings about a mix of emotions. While we may feel happy and proud of their accomplishments, it can also be a challenging time as the dynamics of the parent-child relationship start to change. It is essential to navigate this new phase with grace and understanding. Here are some tips on how to behave with married children.

1. Respect their independence: Remember that your children are now adults with their own lives and families. Avoid being overbearing or intrusive in their decisions, as this may strain your relationship with them and their spouse. Give them space to make choices and respect their right to live their lives in the way they see fit.

2. Boundaries: Establishing clear boundaries is key to maintaining a healthy relationship with your married children. Discuss openly about expectations and respect their need for privacy. Avoid taking offense if they want to spend time alone or with their spouse, as this is a normal aspect of married life.

3. Communicate effectively: When it comes to communication, it’s important to strike a balance. Demonstrate interest in their lives, but be mindful not to overwhelm them with constant inquiries. Ask open-ended questions and actively listen to their responses. Remember, the objective is to cultivate a friendly and supportive relationship, not to interrogate or criticize.

4. Offer support, not judgment: As your children embark on their journey as a married couple, they may face difficulties and make mistakes along the way. Instead of rushing to criticize or judge, offer your support and lend a listening ear. Be a source of wisdom and guidance when they seek it, without imposing your opinions on their choices.

5. Avoid comparisons: Every marriage is unique and comparing your child’s relationship to others can be damaging. Avoid making comments like, “Why don’t you do it like your cousin?” or “Your friend’s husband is so much more successful.” Appreciate and celebrate their individuality, and focus on their strengths as a couple.

6. Be inclusive: Make an effort to include your children’s spouses in family gatherings and events. Treat them with kindness and respect, just as you would with any other family member. Embrace them as part of your family, and make them feel valued and appreciated.

7. Accept change: Understand that your relationship with your married children will naturally change as they prioritize their spouse and their own family unit. While it may be a bittersweet transition, it is important to accept and adapt to this new phase in their lives. Embrace opportunities to bond as a whole family, but also appreciate the importance of one-on-one time with your children.

8. Show appreciation: Express your love and appreciation for your married children regularly. Celebrate their milestones, achievements, and efforts. Small gestures such as sending a heartfelt message, surprising them with a thoughtful gift, or arranging a special family gathering can go a long way in strengthening your bond and making them feel cherished.

Remember, a healthy relationship with your married children requires a delicate balance of support, understanding, boundaries, and acceptance. By practicing these tips, you can ensure that your relationship continues to flourish, and that both you and your children can thrive in this new chapter of their lives.